Scam Letters

I always get junk mail in my email accounts.  Now, I barely glance at them before sending them into email oblivion.  Lately though, I’ve been receiving quite a few emails offering me money for charities and some have been making their way into my regular inbox.  They’ve given me a chuckle, so here’s my version of these emails.


Dear Madam,

With due respect and humility I greet you in the name of our stupendous Lord and Savior.  I am Annabelle, the widow.  My ridiculous rich husband and I are from Cote D’Ivoire.  Sadly, I was not blessed with the respectability of having children.  So I have chosen to hand over to you, a complete stranger, his 1.8 million to use for the goodness of children and those in need.  Perhaps you can use these monies for the less privileged, needles and orphanages and for the making of humanitarian-ness.

This may come to you as a surprise.  I hope you will not expose my name, as I am confident that I am about to repose on you for the mutual benefit of our both families.  In order to move forward, I urgently request your bank accounting information to transfer the millions of dollars I’m freely giving to you.  You also should send your social security number, as I will with due respect and humility use it to release the money.

Best Regard,

Annabelle Widow

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