Model and Empower
Lydia Lockhart
(Note: if you missed the introduction to this series, be sure to read it first.)
I grew up hearing my mom preach every Sunday. My dad would get us ready in the morning, and we would walk with my brothers in the stroller down the street a couple blocks to church. I watched my mom lead prayers and read Scripture; she would stand by the door after the service and greet congregants as they left. Also a seminary grad and ordained pastor, my dad would walk around with an English Bible and a Greek Bible tucked under his arm. He’d always sit with us during the service. For a while when we’d get home from church, he would make chocolate chip pancakes for a family brunch.
For most of my life I took these experiences for granted or even critiqued them. But today I give thanks for the incredible example my parents provided for me, and for all the men and women who contributed to my leadership development. Seeing women on stage speaking and leading habituated me to the reality and normalcy of female leadership. Subconsciously I was fed the message “you can do it!” Most women I have spoken with have been habituated to an exclusively male leadership paradigm as this has all they have been exposed to. Seeing my mom up front teaching at and directing retreats has been empowering and inspiring to them. And I just took it for granted.
As I look towards my seminary graduation in June, I think about how many female role models and male “empowerers” I have had along my journey. These incredible people have noticed God’s gifts being activated in me, and they have opened doors for me to have the opportunity to exercise and practice these ministry gifts. I am the female leader I am today because of the example of my parents and the strong male empowerers and multiple female role models I have been fortunate to have in my life.
Male Empowerers
Historically men have more prevalently held leadership positions in the church. Because women around the world have lived under the curse of male domination (Gen. 3:16), when men bless and empower women in leadership, it has the power to counteract this curse with a corresponding blessing. This being the case, I think it is incredibly important for men to be “empower-ers” or advocates and champions for women in spiritual leadership. The male empowerers in my life have “seen” me. They have noticed my gifts and come alongside me to encourage me in them. They have given me the freedom and opportunities to preach and teach, and they have given me helpful feedback and coaching in these areas. They have given me a “seat at the table” when there were leadership decisions to be made, and they’ve allowed my opinion to hold weight and even decide the direction. Male empowerers step back from doing what they would do by default in order to intentionally cultivate the growing female leaders in their midst.
Male empowerers of me and other women have served as our cheerleaders, peers, and followers. They have been our cheerleaders, arming us with the theological reasons we need to know that our gifts are needed within the body of Christ. They have verbally affirmed me and, more generally, the value of women and the ways we can lead. I have been really encouraged by the men who have been my peers in the classroom and in ministry settings. Those with whom I have had the opportunity to be “co-laborers in the gospel” have given me experiences affirming the real possibility of collaboration and unity between the sexes. Few experiences have humbled and honored me more than to experience men following my leadership. I can think of specific people who have responded to my leadership in very positive ways. They have submitted to the role I have placed them in or the direction I have led the group. They have complimented my preaching. They have given me the freedom to do things differently than they are accustomed to doing things, and they have not protested.
Multiple Female Role Models
The final point I cannot stress enough: a young female leader needs MULTIPLE female role models so she can see a spectrum of what female leadership can look like. Women need to see other women leading—women of different personalities, giftings, marital statuses, ages, and racial/ethnic backgrounds. We need to see women leading from the front, as well as from the sidelines and the back.
I have been blessed to witness incredibly intelligent women teach. Using powerful imagery and rhetoric, they have sharpened my mind just listening to them. Gentle confidence is one of the qualities I most admire in the female leaders I’ve known. A woman with gentle confidence knows she belongs on stage, and she doesn’t have to fight for it.
The bold, radical women leaders I have seen have a direct, clear, concise communication style. These women love truth and proclaim it unabashedly. They carry a tenacity and fire in their bones that is absolutely contagious.
Women who lead from behind influence those they elevate. Like Barnabus, these women lead by pushing younger leaders forward. They don’t inhabit the spotlight, but rather they prefer close mentoring and coaching of those who will take the stage. The loving long-term investment of these pillars cannot be undervalued.
I always love seeing a kind, pastoral woman preach and lead up front. I have been blessed to know several women who are incredibly sweet, compassionate, and tender. These women often see the people no one else sees. Their kindness and even soft-spoken demeanor immediately breaks down barriers with their audience. They can say the most challenging words with such kindness that the listeners almost don’t realize they’re being challenged.
For most if not all of my life until I graduated from college, I did not see a woman of color speak or lead up front. I did not have any mentors of color until after college. Thankfully when I lived in Guatemala I lived in community with many amazing female leaders. All the personality types I mentioned above and more were represented. The strength of their prayer life was incredible, unrivaled by most I have seen in the States. These were women of worship, women who really trusted God with every area of their lives. They knew God experientially. In seminary I was blessed to have a black female professor. I took several classes with her, and she has left an indelible mark on my life and has been influential in shaping my worldview.
I am the woman and leader that I am today because of the impact of my parents and other male empowerers and female role models I’ve had. I encourage you, whatever your story has been, to impact the next generation of female leaders by being either a male empowerer or a female role model to the young women around you.
Song Choice: Roar, by Katy Perry
Why: I can relate to the story of the character depicted in this song. Growing up, I found life was easier for me if I did not “rock the boat”. As I have grown and matured, I have found myself in a process of learning to be courageous and strategic in challenging the status quo. This has looked like advocacy efforts on inter-personal and group levels.
On the enneagram, my personality type is an 8: the Challenger. When I first realized this, I was incredibly encouraged and so much of my life made more sense. The model of the enneagram I was first exposed to had animals by each type. The 8’s animal was a tiger. So when Katie Perry talks about the “eye of the tiger” this has a special meaning for me. “Dancing through the fire” to me connotes the victory we have in Christ and the power our faith gives us to feast (rejoice) in the presence of our enemies (Ps. 23). “You’re gonna hear me roar” is a declaration that the Lord has given me a voice and I will use it for God’s glory. I am called to preach, teach, and speak, and my voice WILL be heard.
Check out Lydia’s song choice and more on the Stronger playlist on Spotify.
Catch up on all of the Stronger posts:
When We Roar by Amanda Macadam
Finally by Jessica Lacy Driscoll
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